"Just Shoot me"
"Just Kill me"
"Put me out of my misery"
"Calgon take me away"
"I just don't care anymore"
"Stick a fork in me"
All things that most of us think or say when Real Life gets overwhelming. Whether its work, family, money, or all those little "issues" that seem to hit all at once...there is a tendency to just need to MAKE IT STOP! I had one of those days yesterday...almost felt like crying, almost felt like locking myself in my room and never leaving. It is at moments like this that many people reach for alchohol or drugs...some form of escapism.
Subspace is actually so much more to me. It is a place where the only things that really matter are my service, my attention, my submission to the will, desire, and pleasure of my owner. It is a place of "cleansing...of sorts"...shedding all the rest of the world and its issues and problems in order to concentrate on the ONE person who you adore and worship. So...
I guess its not surprising that when the world gets to be too much...when vanilla life gets overwhelming...there is a natural "pull" or "yearning" to get cleansed by something powerful and strong enough to refocus and "let go".
Last night I told Goddess that I needed to be "beaten", to have the toil of the real life day erased with pain. I think this was something...an emotion...that was new to her. I'm so glad I was able to talk to her about it, and that conversation inspired this post. Also...
There is a Ying to this Yang. There is also a desire...a need to be held...caressed...cared for...probably much more common I'm guessing. I have those feelings too, like everyone. But they aren't exclusive. It's just that sometimes the need for comfort and the need for pain/suffering collide, and one may tip the balance.
My questions to you are:
- For the subs, do you ever get similar feelings when real life gets to be too much?
- For the doms, have you experienced this in your subs?
- For the switches, can you understand what I'm trying to share here?
- Is it selfish of a sub to have this type of desire or need to be "beaten" or "cleansed with pain"?
- Is this just another bad way of escaping life...like drugs or booze?
- Is this a destructive response to bad days or bad times?
5 comments:
"For the subs, do you ever get similar feelings when real life gets to be too much?"
Absolutely!
"Is it selfish of a sub to have this type of desire or need to be "beaten" or "cleansed with pain"?"
No, although some may disagree and say a sub should not have desires or needs and be there simply to serve their owner - bullshit! We are all human and if our needs are not met then the relationship is veering over into the side of abusive.
"Is this just another bad way of escaping life...like drugs or booze?"
It is a way of escaping yes, but it is not a bad way at all! Don't really see why it is any different to using meditation or sport to escape the pressures of life.
"Is this a destructive response to bad days or bad times?"
I don't see why it is destructive if it helps.
I have found the same thing. If I am feeling overwhelmed, being put at my wife's feet to massage them for an hour or two brings my contentment back.
Seems to me that there are lots of things about submission that serve to relieve that kind of overwhelmed feeling. For sure, being beaten distracts - the pain also triggers the brain's natural endorphins,so it's gonna make you feel better. I think there are times we all feel that way.
Massaging someone's feet is a very sensual, self-soothing kind of thing to do also, as well as distracting.
So - yes, I've felt it; I don't think it's selfish. I don't think it's destructive - unless it's the only way you have to deal with stres, and then I think it might be selfish too.
Interesting post! Thanks!
aisha
Excellent post! I'm so glad I found your blog.
Yes! Yes! Yes!
When life gets overwhelming for me, my mind goes into 'swirl' mode. Too much input or something. That is the time I beg to be tied, restrained, or otherwise forced to focus on Master.
During the times when I am without a Master (such as now), it can be hell.
My last Master refused to do it. He said he was not there for my pleasure, but his. He also felt it could get addictive when subs had this need.
We didn't last long. *grins*
@shapeshifter: Thank you! Your wisdom is sparkling
@subhusband: it is such a deep rooted confidence to know that I'm not alone in my response to bad days.
@aisha: Good point. If it's the "only" response...it's just not dealing with things that probably should be dealt with.
@ Dannah: Welcome! So glad to have you here with me :-)
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